Living in the Tapestry

Can you tell? I am definitely a wanna be cheerleader. Yay!! About 30-ish years ago I considered joining the middle school cheer team. However there’s the little issue of my missing skills for coordination, and my inability to jump more than a foot off the ground. That never stopped me from cheering big from the stands. I’ve found myself continuing to cheer on others around me, for friend’s dreams, their desires, over their goals or processes. “You can do it, keep going, you’ve got this!” Seeing a success in the making is thrilling to me! I’ll raise my hands and shout with you in celebrating victories won. So if you ever need a cheerleader, I’m your girl!

There have been many things I thought my life would look like after celebrating 42 circles around the sun. I thought I would have traveled to all 195 countries in the world by now. I thought for sure I would be speaking seven languages fluidly. At one time, I even considered that I might be single forever. I dreamed that I would live in New York and become a shoe designer. I thought I would sing on Broadway, record an album in Nashville, write music, and publish children’s books by the time I was 25. I thought I would be an actress and would live in California. Also, I considered moving to Australia to sing and go to college.  I thought I would be an international marketing director for McDonald’s in France. Once, I thought I would be a Kindergarten teacher. Another time, I pondered becoming a Sports Therapist for the Atlanta Braves. My 16 year self, she was a dreamer, ya’ll! 

My life doesn’t really look like anything I imagined it would look like at this point. I never dreamed of living in an Alabama rural community called Slapout, surrounded by silos, lakes and rivers. I never imagined I would be married to a great man who is my polar opposite, and my favorite person! I never imagined having a son, who would come into our life when he was 13 years old, and who would literally restructure the shape of our hearts with such deep love for him. I never imagined that I would someday become a MoM to a United States Marine.

But here I am. Living in a dream.

It’s a dream that I absolutely love! It was weaved for me long before I was born. And, each new reveal of the picture truly surprises me. I’ve spent a lifetime trying to peek from behind the tapestry to see what was on the other side, to see beyond the edges to figure out the final image being created beneath my frame. Only the Master Creator knows what my heart has yet to behold.

God pointed my heart to this tapestry concept. There’s the unsightly side where the work happens. There’s the fabric that accepts the Maker’s stitching, and timing, and pacing for the production. And then there’s the final picture, the pretty side, the finished work. Oh, how I want to see that side! I want to peek around the bend to see what He is producing in me. 

I tend to get caught up, loathing the messy moments, the fray, the unsightly mess that looks far from a work of art. That’s when the Lord whispers to my heart, “But just wait my daughter, just wait until you see what I have in store!”

In all of the frazzled chaos, He’s working there. 

The twists and turns were all placed there on purpose, they are the making of something beautiful. 

I’ve thought for a long time that trusting all of my heart to Jesus, meant just having to trust him with the messy side. He means not just the messy side, but also the thread, the canvas, the colors, the direction, the design, and the time it makes to create this masterpiece inside of me, and most importantly, I need to trust him with the final image. I need to trust the Master Designer of my life. 

Will I trust Him with the big reveal, with the end results for what HE has planned for me?

I’m seeing God’s hand weaving shapes, using colors I never imagined, and stitching patterns that are thrilling to me. As I surrender my heart to his making, I’m finding more joy and freedom in allowing The Master Designer to chose what’s best for His creation.

Will I trust him both the mess and the mystery, the chaos and the creation?

True surrender is found in giving God not only the chaos, the canvas and the crafting process, but trusting him with the creation he’s making on the other side as well. 

Trust him with the beautiful things.
Trust him with the outcome, the twists and turns.
Trust Him with the unexpected delights.
Trust Him with the other side.

I found this poem by Corrie ten Boom, a precious warrior, who’s family helped Jews escape the Holocaust by hiding them in their home. She often spoke of the tapestry concept and wrote this perfect poem.

“Life is but a Weaving”
(the Tapestry Poem)

My life is but a weaving
Between my God and me.
I cannot choose the colors
He weaveth steadily.

Oft’ times He weaveth sorrow;
And I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper
And I the underside.

Not ’til the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly
Will God unroll the canvas
And reveal the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful
In the weaver’s skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned

He knows, He loves, He cares;
Nothing this truth can dim.
He gives the very best to those
Who leave the choice to Him.”

~Corrie ten Boom

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, 
which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.
Ephesians 2:10

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